beneath this skin
by lemongrave
Summary: No, she's not paying her debt off with her body. She's giving him her heart. SasuSaku.
1. Sakura

**_x_beneath this skin_x_**

 _This is wrong_ , she thought, as she felt his hand edging between her quivering thighs, his moist breath trailing down the valley of her breasts. Her hands were cradling his face against her chest, letting him hear the resounding thumps of her heart, stubborn enough to beat for him. She began to feel the corner of her eyes pricking with assailing tears, and she inadvertently let out a small whimper.

Sasuke immediately propped himself up, searching her eyes for an answer. She saw him lift his hand to her face but hesitated until he completely removed himself off her, pulling up his trousers and hastily picking up the discarded polo on the floor, visibly convinced that his presence was no longer wanted.

Sakura reached out for his wrist. "I'm sorry," she choked, the beginning of a sob making her voice thick.

"You don't have to. But you could try to be more honest," Sasuke said flatly, not sparing her a glance.

"No, Sasuke-kun, I didn't – "

"We should stop this. It was wrong for me to agree to your offer. Wasn't fair."

Sakura shook her head frantically even though Sasuke couldn't see the desperate gesture.

"No. Please, I just – " Sakura insisted even though she still couldn't phrase her feelings and get it out there for him to take.

"You don't need to worry about the rent. I will _no longer_ be asking for any compensation. Just stay here for as long as you like," she heard him let out a sigh, "until you find a reason to move out."

Sakura's eyes widened with an overwhelming pain, and she had to take in shaky breaths. Her chest was twisting into cruel knots, and she just wanted him to hold her again, feel his warm breath and gentle kiss against her skin, and go off the edge with him.

"You...want me to leave?" she asked, her voice almost collapsing on its own, her eyes staring blankly at the floor.

She was met with silence, and she didn't realize he had freed himself of her grip until he spoke again, now standing at the doorway, his hand on the knob, his back unforgivingly meeting her gaze.

"You're not obligated to stay here. You've paid off your debt."

Sakura could only let out a strangled sob as he finally walked out of the room. She clutched the bedsheet to her naked form, her mind racing with thoughts of him and flashes of tentative intimacy.

She finally cried into her hands, regret filling her as she thought about all those moments she had failed to make him realize that their relationship was no longer just about her compensating for his unwarranted kindness.

xxx

Her parents died from a car accident two years ago and with no relatives living nearby to support her, she had to take on as many jobs as she could in order to feed herself and pay for her apartment rent. She also had to stop schooling due to her situation even though there were only few months before graduation. But it seemed like there were only worst things in store for her. One day, she got home only to find out that a thief had broken into her small apartment, taking everything lootable. The jar containing her saved money that she was hiding deep into her closet was also taken away. Her creased clothes and the photo frame containing the picture of her parents were the only things that remained.

She finally got a stable part-time job at a coffee shop, and Sasuke was a regular customer, his office or rather his company, only a few blocks down the road. From the first moment she laid her eyes on him, she had known he was some unfriendly, stuck-up brat who could only think of other people lowly. She had avoided serving him because she didn't want to give him a perfunctory smile. She thought that he didn't deserve even a fake smile.

But then as fate would have it, the day before Christmas, the shop became short-staffed, with the employees having 'valid' excuses to not be there and help. Sakura volunteered to be the substitute for all those employees and do all the work and the services that the other employees had left unfulfilled just so the manager could raise her meager earnings even just for a day. And so despite the headache tormenting her and the soft grumble of her stomach, she dutifully attended to all the customers.

But while she was carrying the tray containing his cup of espresso and was just about to greet him with a "Thank you for waiting, Sir!" the pain in her head pounded so hard she staggered forward. The tray teetered off her weak hand until it crashed down on the floor, the hot coffee almost splattering on his polo sleeves had he not been able to get out of his seat as quickly as possible. She crumpled to the floor, eyes brimming with tears as she prepared herself to say sorry. But her vision swayed as she looked up at him and she felt her cheek suddenly pressed against the cold floor.

She woke up to the sound of a faint drone, and when she opened her eyes, she realized she was in a car.

"Feel better?"

Her head snapped to the side, her mouth opening in puzzled surprise as she registered the face of the very person she was trying to avoid. She sought for the words to say.

"You shouldn't be overworking yourself."

She could detect the concern in his voice, but his remark still didn't sit well with her.

"Well, excuse me for not being a prince like you who can eat three times a day, possibly even more, without having to overwork," she bitterly scoffed, feeling the yet another grumble of her stomach. She wanted nothing more than to get this over with, go to a convenience store and get herself a cup of ramen.

"Here. I bought you food," he simply offered.

Sakura's mouth watered at the sight of the takeout meal, and she almost grabbed it if not for her pride.

"You don't have to feed me," she said tersely, looking away.

"I'm not letting you die inside my car so eat up." He then pushed it further until she could no longer resist the delectable smell of sautéed meat.

She then took it from him and immediately opened the box, gobbling down the rice and meat, not caring anymore about how messy her eating habit must have looked for him. He didn't fail to give her the large iced tea that came with the meal, and she slurped it noisily.

In less than ten minutes, she was done with the food, and as she dabbed her tissue on her mouth, she chanced him a look.

"Sasuke," he said, meeting her eyes.

Sakura slowly nodded. "Thank you. Thank you, Sasuke-kun."

She bowed her head in embarrassment as she recalled how harshly she had treated and misjudged him before.

"I'm feeling better. I'm going," she smiled shyly at him before pushing the car door open. "Thank you again." Still feeling guilty, she no longer looked at him and just ambled off.

xxx

The next time they saw each other was during a rainy afternoon, when she, failing to pay for her rent for the third time in a row, had finally had her ass kicked out of her apartment, and she had no place to go except to the dark alleyway beside the coffee shop. She didn't plan to stay there, but it was raining hard and she had not time and money to buy a new umbrella, and it was just too much for her. She slid down the wall and cried until she was spent and shivering, thinking if she would still decide to live for another day.

But then she felt the raindrops halting even with the splashing sound around her, and she looked up to see a figure hovering over her, with an umbrella in his hand sheltering the both of them from the onslaught of rain.

"Why are you here?" she asked, not wanting him to see her at her most vulnerable point (probably) in her entire life.

He remained silent, and she angrily stood up. "Go away."

"No."

"I don't need your pity."

"Come with me."

"What?" she bit out, confused.

"You can stay in my apartment," he said, his tone heavily serious.

She laughed dryly. "And why am I gonna do that? Is living with a complete stranger the norm now?"

"You don't have a choice."

He merely stated the truth, but it was enough trigger for her to bring her hands to his chest in an attempt to shove him away.

He caught her wrists though and held her dripping figure against his warm, iron-pressed suit.

"Trust me, Sakura."

And the downpour continued.

xxx

She still felt wary around him even when he had practically made sure that she would be comfortable with their living arrangement. He gave her the guest room which was really big and had its own washroom inside. He also silently showed her that the doorknob was working. He had assured her that he wouldn't be home most of the time because of business matters and so, she could always have the whole apartment to herself. That and the fact that there would be no chance for him to do any of the suspicions she had been harboring against him.

Sasuke stayed true to his word. They merely saw each other regularly even though they were living under the same roof. By the time she woke up, Sasuke was no longer there. And Sasuke still wasn't there by the time she turned off the bedside lamp. He would bring her groceries every now and then, so Sakura could actually cook for herself. She once contemplated cooking for him but was afraid it could signify another meaning.

Then one night, she had just come out of shower when she heard a bang outside. She quickly wrapped a towel around herself and went outside her room to check. She then saw Sasuke leaning heavily against the door, his face crumpled in distress and fury. Sakura was just about to open her mouth when Sasuke suddenly lunged at her, clasping his hands on her arms and vehemently kissing her, pushing her against the nearest wall. Sakura was so shocked that she felt paralyzed. Only when Sasuke's hand slipped inside her thigh did she find the strength to shove him hard and slap him.

"What the hell are you doing?!" she growled, feeling betrayed.

Sasuke just went to her again and cupped her cheeks, pressing his mouth against hers before pulling back quickly. "Please, just this once. I'm lonely," he whispered desperately before catching her lips again.

Sakura's mind was telling her to get the hell out of there, scramble away, but definitely not before delivering a punch to his face. But her heart was taking pity on him. She couldn't resist the miserable look in his eyes as he told her that. He was feeling lonely, and during those times that she was feeling the same thing, hopeless, and ready to give up, he was the only one who was there to catch her. So she felt responsible to pay him back for all that he had done for her, and if it was to be in this form, then so be it.

She then responded initially with hesitation. But Sasuke ran his hands up and down her arms until he hoisted her up, making her gasp at the sudden movement. Sasuke took the opportunity to plunge his tongue in and taste hers. Sakura had never been in any relationship before, and she didn't know anything about this activity, but she just followed her instinct, letting her tongue wriggle against his as she wrapped her arms tightly around his neck.

Suddenly, Sasuke was leading them towards his room, and she felt him tug at her towel. She broke the kiss for air, blushing madly as she realized how close their faces were. She gave a sharp gasp when he laid her down on the bed and pulled the towel off her. She immediately covered herself helplessly and turned her face away, but Sasuke just kissed the inside of her wrist and trailed his lips up her arm until he reached the shell of her ear.

"You're beautiful."

She gave herself to him that night. She almost cried at the pain of sudden intrusion, but Sasuke had uncharacteristically whispered sweet nothings into her ear, distracting her as she felt the pain rapidly ebbing away, quickly being displaced by immense pleasure. Their melded bodies followed an erratic rhythm, but soon enough she was crying out his name, and he was mumbling a sorry into her hair.

The morning after that was very awkward that Sakura had to pretend that she was still asleep when she felt Sasuke stirring beside her, shifting to face her back. She then felt his hands brush across her naked waist, and she swore the hairs on her skin stood up at the slightest of friction.

"Sakura. Stop pretending."

She then rolled to face him but still averted her gaze away.

"I'm sorry about last night," he began softly.

"Uhm...no. It's...I understand," she said, still not looking at him. She really didn't regret it because he had told her his reason, and she had found her own justification for agreeing. He also made it easier for her, and she felt a little thankful.

He moved to lie on his back, his arm draped on his forehead.

"It's a lot of pressure about there. It's killing me."

She felt her heart clench at his statement, and she didn't know why.

"I'm sorry. For all the things I said to you before..."

"Don't. It's true anyway. I've got the money to do anything I want."

"Yes, but you're not as happy as I accused you to be," she said apologetically, a sad smile marring her face.

She then felt his finger lightly brushing across her cheek. "Sometimes, I am."

His smoldering eyes were boring into hers, and she reddened at his gesture, forcibly looking at anything but him. Sasuke then sat up and gathered his clothes.

"Rest for the day, Sakura." His eyes lingered at somewhere below her stomach, and she caught on his meaning.

"No...I'm go—"

"I didn't know. I'm sorry."

"I don't mind. Not like I'm reserving it for someone anyway," she half-chuckled, not wanting him to make a big deal out of it.

"But I'm a stranger."

Sakura also moved to sat up and without thinking, held his hand.

"No. Not anymore, Sasuke-kun."

xxx

She didn't know how it had happened, but all of a sudden, she was seeing everything in a new light. She found herself wanting to cook for him, wanting to ask him about his work, staying up late to wait for him, watching TV with him, feeling butterflies in her stomach whenever he'd tell her he'd pick her up from work. Many times, he'd offer to give her money so she could get back to school, but she'd always refuse it saying she was saving up on her own, and Sasuke always respected that, never failing to assure her that his assistance would always be available for her if she needed it.

It didn't come as a surprise to her when on the night of her 21st birthday that they celebrated together, she found herself knocking on his door. She couldn't sleep, and there was an aching need to touch him.

She was only in her flimsy nightgown when he opened the door, startled at the sight of her. Forgetting about all her hesitations, she jumped up to him and kissed him hard, seeking entrance.

Sasuke lightly pushed her away.

"You should go back to sleep," he said sternly.

She just shook her head. "No. You've been too kind to me and I owe you a lot, Sasuke-kun. I figured this is the only way I can pay you. I will make you feel less lonely."

She pressed a kiss to his forehead and slid down the bridge of his nose, muttering against his lips, "Please let me."

He held her gaze for a second before finally accepting her invitation, pulling her in and crashing his mouth against hers. She smiled against his lips, delighted that they shared the same need for each other's company.

Three months into the routine, and Sakura had been trying to convince herself that it was just nothing more than a physical relationship, something that each of them could benefit from, some sort of a stress-reliever. But every time she thought of it as casual, every time she found Sasuke absent when she woke up in the morning, and every time she thought of the reasons why Sasuke wouldn't come home on some nights, she found it difficult to breathe.

She spent away the restless nights crying because she wanted him to know that things had become different, that it was never the same for her, and that she wanted him to feel that way, too. She was tired of telling her co-workers that they were nothing but friends, tired of seeing his picture on TV or on the newspapers getting rumored about having another blonde girl as his girlfriend, and she wanted so much more from him. He had never opened up so much about himself and his family, and she thought it was because she didn't have the right to know. But she wanted to share his every pain. He was always there for her. He consoled her the whole night during the death anniversary of her parents, and she wouldn't forget how gently he rocked her to sleep, never leaving her side until she woke up and pushed him to go to work. She wanted to be the one he'd immediately go to for emotional comfort. She wanted to be his strength.

But every time, she lacked the resolve to tell him just how much he had been growing on her, just how much she couldn't contain her feelings anymore because she was afraid that he didn't want the same thing. Even when they made love, she couldn't help but shed silent tears as she thought about what Sasuke might be feeling because she wouldn't be able to accept it if he'd let her know that she was only treated as one of his partners in bed. She couldn't go on pretending that she was doing it just because she wanted to pay off her debts. She couldn't go on pretending that it meant nothing, that he meant nothing to her because she was more than willing to give him more than her body.

And the next time Sasuke came home, she'd make sure he'd know it.

* * *

a bit ooc but i enjoyed writing this. will be a twoshot. expect the next chap in two weeks (that is, if i receive enough encouragement). please drop me reviewssss and read my profile. thanks!


	2. Sasuke

**a/n** : Sasuke's pov coz a lot of people have been asking. I don't usually do this because I like one-character POVs – it sustains the mystery – and I especially don't like making unnecessary repetitions but here goes:

* * *

Her hands were now traveling down his chest, having finished undoing the first few buttons of his polo. She started sucking on his pulse, her tongue tracing his collarbones, making its way up to the back of his ear, kissing it with practiced mobility. Her wandering hands had finally reached their destination, but instead of groaning in pleasure, he growled instead, pushing the half-naked, busty stranger off his lap. He quickly redid and fixed his polo, stalking off the room in a haste, acrid guilt filling him as he remembered the kisses and touches that weren't _hers,_ that weren't Sakura's, now tainting his skin. He didn't think he'd reach this point where alcohol could no longer provide the opium that he needed, where he'd have to resume the vice that he had abandoned months ago because of her.

But then again, he didn't think it'd be this hard to forget.

He pressed the gas pedal hard and just stared at the road ahead, with no direction in mind until he realized he was already in front of the apartment that they were sharing. He had to stomp down the violent urge to storm off inside and just hold her again. It didn't matter anymore if she'd hold him back or not.

But sometimes, he'd indulge himself by staying in the illusion that every time she kissed him back, it was because it meant something to her, too, that he meant something more to her, not just as some random benefactor she had to treat nicely.

xxx

The first time he walked into that coffee shop and saw her mop of pink hair, he knew immediately that going there would be a day-to-day habit. She always wore that radiant smile until he found himself wanting it all for himself. But he kept his emotions in check. He had to because it was obvious, too obvious, that the girl didn't want to do anything with him. She had always kept her distance from him, and he tried not to be affected by it. He tried to quell these wisps, these shards of feelings waiting to be fulfilled.

He couldn't pinpoint what exactly about her had successfully gotten through his barriers. He was the famous bachelor in town, and despite his significant experience with women whose faces he never attempted to remember (not any one of them), no one had ever interested him as much as she did. For the first time, he didn't feel the ache down there. It was somewhere inside his chest, broad and throbbing, and he needed to do something..

He realized that maybe he just needed an escape, a break from the hell he was living through as the remaining son of the Uchihas. It wasn't his fault that it was his brother who had the complete set of skills to run the company, wasn't his fault that it was his brother who was on that plane for a business meeting, wasn't his fault that he wasn't the one who died instead. Most of the time though he'd wonder if it could've been better if he was the one now dead. He never wished for his brother to die. His parents were in grief, and he couldn't blame them. But sometimes he wanted to let them know he was in grief too, probably deeper than they were. After all, his brother was the only friend he ever had.

But that was two years ago, and he had tried everything to survive on his own. And whenever he saw her smile despite the many times it seemed tired and crumpled, he'd find relief at the thought that at least he managed to survive and got this far.

Living to see her smile was definitely worth it.

He had anticipated the day that she would be the one to serve him his coffee, and he was more than willing to do anything to get her to notice him the moment he saw her carrying the tray, on her way to bring his coffee. Seeing her approaching him stirred in him the cheap thrill of finally having in possession something he had been yearning for. But when she stumbled and crashed to the floor, he acted out of instinct, of an unfamiliar jolt of fear. He didn't pay attention to the manager bowing his head in apology and just picked the woman up into his arms, striding out the shop in an alarming rush.

He put her safely inside his car, opening all windows for ventilation, loosening up some of the buttons of her uniform, and almost ready to take her to the nearest hospital, when she started to move her head, letting out a raspy breathing. He couldn't help sighing loudly in relief. He then ran to the restaurant just across the street. She looked so pale and fragile, and he figured it was probably due to hunger and over fatigue, so he bought a complete meal of meat and vegetables, wishing she didn't have any food allergy.

When he got back, she was already coming to her senses, and he couldn't be more thankful. Just before she opened her eyes, he managed to see her nametag, and he softly muttered her name, loving the way her eyes opened seconds later as if a response to his call.

She seemed to be very much wary of him, and he perfectly understood that. In fact, she just interested him more. But this was enough for now, to be finally able to talk to her, hear her voice and her 'thank you' despite her reluctance to engage him any further.

xxx

He still visited the coffee shop in hopes of having more interaction with her, but ever since the day she fainted, she was on an on-and-off attendance. While it was uncharacteristic of him, he couldn't help but feel agitated, _worried_ , so he had to use his position and power to squeeze bits of information out of the manager. That was when he got to know about her miserable condition, and right then and there, he wanted to put her out of it.

He no longer entertained any second thoughts when he found her at the alleyway beside the shop, drenched in rain and in her own tears.

She was pushing him away, but he couldn't do that when all he wanted was to pull her in. He couldn't understand what he was feeling, but he wasn't ready to oppose it. He wasn't good with words. He didn't know how to make her accept him, his offer of help. But he wanted her to trust him. He wanted her.

xxx

He knew it was irrational for him to just bring her into his apartment, but he didn't think it selfish for him to just content himself with seeing her everyday even though she wouldn't return his look. He didn't want to impose his presence, so sensing her discomfort, he stayed as far as possible, making sure she could live in a comfortable manner as much as possible. They were practically strangers living under the same roof. They would only talk whenever he brought her groceries. He hadn't done any grocery shopping before, but he wanted to make her smile so he did his best in picking out and buying grocery items that would make sense to her. All he really wanted was to hear her thank him again.

But then, one day, his parents got to know about their arrangement. He didn't want to keep it a secret. Just that he didn't see the need for him to inform them about the latest news on his personal life.

"Leave the girl, Sasuke," his father said with a decisive stress on 'leave.'

Suddenly, his mother moved to place her hand on his arm. "Sasuke, son, you can buy her another apartment. She doesn't have to live with you. It'd be bad –"

"There's no image to protect," he retorted quickly, "I've never been a good son to you anyway, have I?" he asked sardonically.

"That's not the point. We're meeting with the Yamanakas soon. I want you to make a good impression on their daughter," his father said with finality and restraint.

He scowled.

"Sasuke, I hope you'll understand that this partnership, your marriage, will be beneficial to the company," his mother offered, squeezing his arm lightly, an attempt to pacify him.

"Why? Because I'm not performing enough? Never good enough for you?" Sasuke countered, his voice rising.

"Yes!"

His father's voiced boomed loudly in the room, and Sasuke wanted to punch something as he looked away from his parents.

"That's why you have to leave that girl."

He gave them a resolute look. "No. I'm keeping her."

He wasn't thinking straight that night when he stormed into their shared apartment. That was why when he saw Sakura, oh his sweet Sakura, he could no longer hold back his pent-up passion. He was sorry, but she was the only joy he knew, and he couldn't stop himself. When she slapped him hard and he realized how much he had betrayed her, he instinctively came to his senses, the realization of his betrayal punching him in the gut. But there was also that nagging feeling inside that he wanted to follow. He realized that maybe if he could just get a taste of her to satisfy his curiosity about her, then maybe that would be enough to stop his inexplicable feelings for her, and he could now do what his father wanted him to do – to let her go.

And so, he decided to share a piece of himself with her that night. He was surprised that she responded eventually, but despite the pleasure of seeing her writhe underneath him, her hands fisting on the sheets, her nails leaving crescents on his shoulders, her lips slanting over his carelessly, he still felt like he was an undeserving monster taking advantage of the situation.

He felt worse when he realized he was her first. There was this feeling of amorous pride bubbling up inside, but then at the same time, he knew he didn't deserve it. She never wanted him, would never imagine him to be her first. But her reassurances the morning after washed that guilt away. She was so beautiful in every sense of the word, and he wanted to mark her as his permanently. He would like her to be the first one he'd see every time he got home from work, the one he'd cuddle with, sleep with, laugh with, smile with, survive this life with.

But he knew it wasn't the same for her.

xxx

He still managed to maintain his distance after that incident. He suddenly wanted to fall back into their routine before as strangers so as not to complicate things for her. And he wanted to stop imagining things, to stop fantasizing about what wasn't there. He wanted to stop reading meanings into her change of actions. She had begun surprising him with dinners of her own cooking, her concerned questions about his day, her sleeping in the sofa until he nudged her awake upon his arrival, her requests to watch movie with him, and her cheerful and talkative attitude whenever he'd drive her to work. Sometimes, he'd be haunted by the thoughts that it was her way of repaying him for the apartment and it hurt him. But if it was the only way to be near her, then he would take it. He had also asked her a lot of times to accept his offer of assistance for her schooling, but he'd like to respect her insistence on independence. His feelings for her could only swell with each passing day.

It was such a big surprise to him when he came home one night to find that Sakura had prepared a dinner for the two of them, reasoning that it was her 21st birthday. If he had only known, he would've been the one to take her out on a dinner (romantic or not). But it was a bigger shock that she had thought of offering herself to him that night as form of repayment. The knowledge that Sakura only saw everything between them in terms of payment was painful for him to bear, but he was willing to take her in any way he could.

He would always remind himself that it was nothing more than a physical relationship every time they would do it, that they would share the same bed, sheets, space, but never the same feeling. But then one night when he found her crying, sharing with him that it was her parents' death anniversary, he found himself wanting nothing more than to cuddle her to sleep. He realized that this was more deeply satisfying than any of the physical intimacies they had shared before. He wanted more moments like this, wanted to share her every pain, wanted to know more about her, wanted to boast her to his parents (even without their approval), wanted to show her off to the rest of the world, wanted to be her strength, wanted a future with her.

But sometimes, in moments of supposed passion, she would cry, and it confused and hurt him every time. He didn't want to force her any longer. He couldn't keep hurting what was important to him.

He got out of his car, pasted on his nonchalant face, and twisted the unlocked knob of the door.

He saw her curled up in the sofa, her hair in a messy bun, her eyes spent and strained. She was wearing his shirt, and he felt his control slipping away. He wanted to hold her, feel her warmth again, apologize for whatever he had said, and tell her how much...just how much he needed her to stay.

But he walked to where she was sitting and looked down on her, meeting her eyes for one last time:

"I'm letting you go."

* * *

Yes, as per your request, this is no longer just a twoshot!

Sorry for the minimal conversation. This was just supposed to be a fill-in that's to let you know about Sasuke's context. The next chapter would contain both of their POVs (even though that's not usually my style).

I'm so sorry for all the readers who expected an update last week. I was suddenly immersed into an avalanche of exams and academic requirements and thesis sht. I'll be having a break in the third week of March. I'm hoping I can put up the last chapter by then.

Hint: I'm not a fan of happy _happy_ endings. But Oh well. I've got about two weeks to think it over.


	3. Not

" _I'm letting you go."_

The words echoed mercilessly in her head ,and yet she refused to believe it. No, she didn't want to understand because she made a promise to herself that the next time she saw him, she wouldn't let him go. She steeled her gaze at him even when her thoughts were a blank. Sasuke began turning away so she did the only thing her heart was desiring her to do.

She shot up from the sofa and tugged him down, slanting her mouth over his. She wound her arms around his neck as she moved her lips against his rather cold flesh, coaxing out a reaction from him. She had her eyes closed as she savored his comforting warmth, kissing him slow but with the desperation and passion that she had bottled up for so long.

She broke away temporarily and cupped his cheeks. "I love you," she breathed, touching her nose to his, smiling at how natural and fulfilling it was to say it – she had never been so sure of anything else in her life.

Sasuke, however, pushed himself off her sharply as if doused by cold water. He dug his hands in his pockets as he paced away, stopping at a respectable distance from her. He wanted nothing else but to hold her, kiss her senseless, let her feel his full reciprocation of what she was offering. He was willing to take his words back upon feeling her touch, but a painful realization jolted through him upon hearing her words.

"You're confused," he stated stolidly.

Sakura could only look back at him, gaping slightly as she fumbled for words to say.

"Wha - how. . . How could you say that?" she whispered brokenly.

"Don't mistake gratitude for love," he said as if he knew any better. He would like to think he didn't. But there was no way that she could love him when he practically took advantage of her situation. He shouldn't have ever touched her. He shouldn't have made her feel obligated to pay him for what he had given her.

Sakura balled her fists, keeping her tears at bay. She had just laid her heart out for him to take. She didn't expect he'd throw it back so easily, so quickly. "I don't understand, Sasuke-kun. I just . . . I do lo – "

He hardened his gaze, determined to drive home his point and end this conversation as cleanly as he could. "You have no one else."

Her tears finally spilled as the implication of what he was saying hit her.

"You pity me," she countered accusingly. _All along, our relationship has been out of pity_.

He turned his back on her, briefly closing his eyes as he tried to control himself. That wasn't what he wanted her to feel. She was never a beneficiary to him. It was never pity that allowed him the decision to take her in.

Her sobs came in sputter, and she felt her knees go weaker by the minute. He wasn't answering, and it was enough confirmation for Sakura. Whatever they had was never real. It was nothing but an act of kindness on his part, and she was a piteous fool to read something else into it.

She sighed shakily as she braved to ask a question, the final nail that would help her seal off her feelings.

"Are you in love with someone else?"

Sasuke half turned. "I'm getting married," he paused. "For convenience," he added, lowering his voice. He didn't know why he felt the need to clarify things, but she deserved to be offered some semblance of truth.

"And you're just OK with that?" she bit back severely. She wouldn't deny that she felt hope surging from within at his admission that he'd be marrying not out of love, but she immediately squashed it down. Sasuke seemed too certain of not doing otherwise.

"I have no choice," he shrugged as nonchalantly as possible.

Sakura then angrily strode towards him until she was facing him. "Why won't you tell me anything Sasuke? Please tell me. I want to know everything that's hurting you! I can – "

"Don't you think it's too late for that?" he countered with wry amusement, keeping up the facade that he didn't actually care that much.

His resolve of letting her go was dissolving fast, and he wished it was easy to fall into her arms and just be with her. But he was afraid he couldn't protect her. He was afraid because he had always been a coward. He had to let her go. He couldn't drag her down with him especially when she was only under the illusion that what she was feeling for him was love. They both knew it was nothing complicated but simple gratitude. He just needed her to know that she was no longer obligated to stay as a form of repayment. She needed to start her life anew, and it would be for the best if it would be without him who had been nothing but a deadweight.

"Sakura, this is over. I'm leaving you this apartment. You can stay here for as long as you want. No need to pay me back."

He walked past her, striving to reach the door without succumbing to the need to have one last look at her. He was, however, stopped dead in his tracks when he felt arms snaking around his waist.

If it was only Sakura, she didn't want to let go but she knew he could no longer hold him back. He had responsibilities to fulfill that she knew nothing about – that wasn't for her to know because she was nothing important to him. And she would accept that. But just before she let him walk away, she wanted to hold him one last time.

"Please. Just give me ten seconds."

She pressed the side of her face against his back, tightening her hold around him, imprinting _this_ feeling in her heart. She would never forget.

"6. . .4 . . ." she mumbled, her voice thick with tears, "2 . . . 1."

She then released him and swiped at her tears vigorously. "Thank you, Sasuke-kun, for everything," she said as warmly and cheerily as she could. She would have given him the brightest smile that she could, but he no longer faced her and just hastily stepped out the door.

The click of the door sounded distant and conclusive as she fell to her knees and cried to her heart's content.

xxx

He had managed to survive for a week by dedicating himself to office work. And yet his thoughts of Sakura and her pink hair and glassy green eyes overwhelmed him in every instance of breathing – and he always got pulled back into the undercurrent. Too many times, he had to extinguish the burning wick of desire to drive to the apartment and check up on her. He thought it'd be okay to simply see the lights on inside – he just needed to know that she was still there, never mind the physicality of their separation. Too many times, he had to remind himself that it was his decision to let her go.

He had to resume living the life determined for him, and it would've been tolerable if he only had to face the company's documents without having unnecessary confrontations with his parents. But here he was at a restaurant, acting civil with them, waiting for their soon-to-be business partners and his soon-to-be wife.

Ino Yamanaka was a woman of stature, and she didn't fail to exude that aura in every confident step that she took, donned in her royal blue halter gown. There was a certain definiteness in her angular cheekbone, and the rigid placidity of her gaze spoke of quiet conviction and regality. When she fixed him with that stare, he knew right away that she meant business.

Their respective parents moved to a separate table to talk of "business," and Ino's mother reasoned in a rather gaily fashion that Sasuke and her daughter must likewise do some acquainting.

Ino daintily took a sip of her cranberry wine before resting her chin lightly against her gloved hand. Sasuke paid her no attention, focusing on slicing off his steak, despite feeling her probing gaze.

"You know . . ." she started with a honeyed voice. "I've never seen such a smokingly, alluringly hot man before, and I would've jumped you at any moment . . ."

Sasuke coldly met her gaze then and saw her smirk.

"Except that I'm already deeply in love with someone else and I'd like to believe you suffer from the same pain," she finished somberly, pursing her lips as she waited for his reply.

He focused back on his plate, not wanting to engage her fancies. He wasn't attracted to the idea of shared suffering because at the end of the day, it still spelled nothing but a hopeless case of despair for each party. Affected displays of sympathy weren't a prerequisite to arranging a loveless marriage, and like her, he only meant business so he'd rather they get this over with as quickly as possible.

"It's none of my concern," he said dryly.

"You have to care," she replied swiftly, "I don't wanna ruin my life by having this nonsense arrangement."

"I wouldn't be here if I had a choice."

"Actually, you did. And you didn't take it," she sighed in frustration, then she clicked her tongue. "I'm planning to run away with my lover after the party tomorrow. Just letting you know so that you wouldn't stand there with your mouth hanging open and flashing cameras swarming around your face."

"Besides, I need you to cooperate." She then extended her hand to him. "So, let's just give them a show, shall we?"

Sasuke could only eye her hand, hating how easy she had put it, as if escaping was also an option for him.

"You wish it was that easy."

Ino snorted. "Oh, it's never easy. But that doesn't mean you give up."

Sasuke didn't know what to say in return. He had been a coward, and a stranger need not rub it in.

"Our company needs your investment," he said instead. After all, one could never go wrong with facts.

Ino gulped down the remaining liquid in her glass before she began again. "I've heard things about you. To be honest, your company doesn't need me or our company. You just need to man up and face the responsibilities."

He was quick to shoot her a glare. "You don't know anything."

She let out a theatrical smile. "I know about your tragedies, honey."

Sasuke clenched his fists and scraped his chair backward, which caught the attention of their audience from the other table.

Ino immediately reached out for his hand on the table, hastily sending their audience a reassuring smile. She looked at him gently then before withdrawing.

"Your brother would probably have not liked this. I don't. And I'm sure as hell you don't. So we just need to fake our way through this until tomorrow and we're done."

Sasuke made a move to stand, unable and unwilling to comprehend her antics.

"I've also heard about a certain girl – " Ino persisted, looking up at him knowingly.

"Don't," he choked. He couldn't afford having her poke into a wound that would probably never heal.

Ino smiled triumphantly. "Then it's a deal."

xxx

To say she'd been living in darkness was a cruel understatement. At least in the dark, she could move through, feel the pulse of life somewhere beyond its horizons. But ever since he walked out of the door, she'd been living in the shell of void, sucked out of life, harrowingly suspended between the now and the then.

She wanted to hold on to their memories, and each time, she bore the multiple brunt of regret at not realizing her true feelings sooner, at failing to make him believe she had loved him not out of gratitude but despite her brokenness. With him, she was not a fragmented picture but a woman, alive and whole and passionately in love.

He had let her go, and she took it as an imperative to start anew, but without him, she could only end. She had stopped going to work, choosing to stay in the apartment, with the flimsy hope that he would return to her any minute. She wanted to be there if and when that happened. But it had been a week, and he was nowhere in sight.

Across the table laid different newspapers having the same material, announcing the near engagement of the heir of Uchiha Inc. and the heiress of Yamanaka Corps. It was the talk of the town and of the country because how could it not when it was practically the marriage of the century, the union of the two most powerful and influential business groups in Japan and Asia.

It was only in these broadsheets that she was able to see his face even though each captured shot also had the Yamanaka heiress in the picture. She had opted not to turn on the TV for days because he and his future wife were sure to be featured in various channels, which she wouldn't be able to take. But the need to see him in motion and hear his voice proved to be stronger.

She reached for the remote concealed between the strewn sheets atop the table and switched the machine on with a heavy and dejected sigh. She pressed the button unceasingly until she landed on a certain scene that had her heart wrenched into knots. Tears started rolling down as she sat there, witnessing how he was standing so close to another woman in one moment and securing his arm around her the next. His face was calm and intent as he led the woman inside the grand hall, protecting her from the intrusive cameras.

The headline repetitively flashed in big, bold print as if mocking her. He was to be engaged in an hour, and she wouldn't be able to stop him.

She had to let go.

xxx

"People still can't believe you did that," Sasuke deadpanned as he noticed the interested looks that people were sending his companion's way.

The scene that Ino made five years ago in that grand banquet hall where they were to announce their official engagement had become a legendary story that had traveled across the globe and which until now was still an inexorably hot topic among paparazzi, bloggers, and plain gossipers.

The woman in question, however, didn't seem to care as evidenced by the way she sauntered into the restaurant without batting an eyelash at the waiters and waitresses who were running their eyes up and down her figure, confidentially lowering their voices as they passed words with one another in a not-so-discreet manner.

"Oh, honey. You'll do anything for love." She winked and crinkled a smile, confidently glancing around at the fascinatingly nosy onlookers to make a point.

He could still remember how she had held his hand on the stage to lure the crowd in front them into an entrancing show. He did his own part for the act, resting his had lightly against her lower back, as she spoke over the mic.

" _It is an honor for me to be here with you in this most important night of my life. I am pleased to inform you that I am to be wed in a few months and it is with the love of my life who is currently waiting for me at the backstage. So enjoy the night as we make our sweet escapade!"_

He had smiled at her then for her bravery, catching her six-inch heels as she took off running towards where her lover was. His part of the deal was pretty easy as he only needed to make sure that there would be no one around in the backstage at the time of announcement. They had perfected the act so as to give their parents a sense of complacency and make them believe that their growing intimacy was of an amorous nature that they deserved a certain level of privacy.

The incident was followed by an expected commotion. The Yamanakas threatened to disown their daughter, but Ino stood her ground and resigned from her post as she escaped with her lover to who-knows-where, cutting off all forms of contact with her parents. Their distraught over the whole shebang affected their company's performance so much so that the Uchihas eventually found them no longer an asset loss.

Sasuke's parents never questioned him if he knew anything about his supposed marriage partner's plans, but he would've denied it even if they did. He admired her for what she had done and wished he had also possessed the courage to run back to Sakura and run away together.

A year later, Ino reappeared, healthy and pregnant. She made it known in a conference that she was back in Japan to support the first-ever exhibit of his artist husband. Sasuke didn't know what had transpired between Ino and her parents, but Ino could only talk about how her parents would always insist that she leave her kids with them on weekends. She was no longer the heiress, however, as she swore to just travel with her husband to support him with his world-class exhibits.

Sasuke, on the other hand, had stayed civil with his father, promising him that he would lead and sustain the company, with the condition that he would no longer be forced into business dates to meet prospect marriage partners. His mother had been more affectionate towards him, supporting him with every decision that he would make for the company, shielding him from his father's autocratic methods. But truthfully, he had stopped caring. His life had already reached a point of stability, and he'd like to believe that it was enough to get him by for the rest of his life.

However, Ino had stubbornly refused to let him have a closure with the previous chapter of his life. She had reconnected with him months after her reappearance, and the first thing that came out of her mouth was Sakura's name.

" _So, how is Sakura?"_

"Have you found her yet?" Ino asked worryingly.

He looked at her for a moment before shifting his gaze down. After the incident five years ago, he immediately drove towards the apartment, finding the lights on upon his arrival. He didn't even bother knocking as he keyed his way in. But the moment he stepped inside, he knew she wasn't there anymore. The place was cleaned up, her presence erased from every corner. He had looked for her everywhere, and he would have searched around the world, but he knew he would never find her. She wouldn't let him. Not after what he did.

"No," he said, as painful as it was to admit.

"Then perhaps you're not searching hard enough."

He swirled the wine in his glass before emptying it into his mouth. It wasn't that he had stopped looking; he was just waiting. He wouldn't be able to find someone who didn't want to be found, and he'd respect that.

"I let her go."

Ino moaned solicitously. "Don't worry. I'll help you. I'll have the company's agents look for her all over the world."

Sasuke grunted. "Stop worrying about _us_."

"I can't! Your love life has been my business ever since I got her name. Look, when I ran away with Sai, I was hoping you'd do the same thing with your girl."

'Sorry to disappoint," he stated flatly.

"I know. But I want you to be happy," she said earnestly.

Sasuke just cocked a brow.

"We were on the same boat back then, and I managed to get out, and . . ." she paused, shaking her head. "I don't wanna keep spewing some sentimental lines here, but you get what I'm saying, right? Your brother would want you happy. I didn't have the chance to know him personally but from what I've heard, he was a good – "

"He was a great man," he supplied, smiling lightly. "He was my best friend."

She nodded, smiling in return. "If he was still alive, I'm sure he'd be the one in my position."

They lapsed then into a contemplative silence.

"Anyway, I'm flying with Sai to New York the day after tomorrow. If you have time, drop by our house later for dinner. You might also find some paintings of Sai worth hanging in your office," she laughed.

"Of course. And I'd also like to meet your twins."

xxx

Before driving back to his office, he stopped by his favorite coffee shop. It was a routine that he had fallen into as a way of coping. He missed her dreadfully, and he still was hoping he'd soon find her there someday, serving him his espresso shot. His phone vibrated inside his pocket, and he was about to get it when he saw a motion of pink exiting the shop. He jerked up from his seat, sending the chair reeling backward, as he unhesitatingly ran out.

The figure was about to cross the street, and he caught up, pulled her around until he was looking at the same face she made five years ago inside his car when he called her name and her eyes fluttered open.

"Sakura."

* * *

That was the original ending or something as ambiguous as that but I made you wait for almost three months so I thought it'd be injustice to serve such an unsatisfying ending. I'll be adding another chapter, don't worry.

To answer _Rainbow Sparkle_ 's question, I did not delete my previous fics here because this is a new account. I have another (older) account here on FFN that doesn't have M-rated fics. This account is just like a practice platform for lemony endeavors. Having said that, I'll have to update my other stories in that account as well as upload some fluff bits to type out the rusty tips of my fingers – I haven't written anything non-academic in months and it shows here!

I'm really sorry for the late update and dull chapter. A lot of things happened. And I almost lost my life either by accident or by my own hands. But all is well now. (Just finished watching _3 idiots_ haha).

Give me a holler if you're still reading this!


	4. Now

Sakura just blinked at him uncomprehendingly. She had a bit of a shake with the jerky movement of being twirled around, but when her gaze focused, she almost dropped the cup of coffee she was holding. It just couldn't be.

"Sasuke-kun."

She tried hard to hold it in, but it was hard to when only he occupied her thoughts for the last five years. She had always dreamt of calling out his name like this once more.

A slow smile was breaking through Sasuke's face when he noticed something glinting on her hand. It didn't take too much of a squint to recognize the gold band around her finger. He immediately withdrew his touch.

Sakura noticed where his gaze had landed, and she could only look down. _He didn't need to know._

After a while, she looked up at him again rather awkwardly to make a quick greeting. "It's nice to see you again, Uchiha-san."

He didn't expect a reunion like this. He knew now that it was impossible to get back to what it was before, to have her back, but having her say his name so formally as if reinforcing the thick distance that had grown between them was a nightmare come true. He felt an unjustifiable sense of anger and envy bubbling up inside for that lucky man who now had the pleasure of having his name uttered by Sakura day and night.

He nodded stiffly, shoving down his fists inside his pockets.

And just like that, their conversation – what was supposed to be a splendid, rosy reunion – came to a standstill. Sasuke didn't feel like offering his belated obligatory congratulatory remark, and there was nothing left to talk about.

"I'm going then. See you around."

But before he could even turn away, Sakura's hand shot out to grab his wrist.

"Wait . . . Can we talk?"

It was pure instinct, and she knew she'd probably regret this later. But she'd gone through every layer of this painful process for the past years, and she'd like to believe she'd be immuned to the agonizing feeling by now.

Besides, if it meant being with him again for just one fleeting moment, then she'd willingly suffer a lifetime of bitter regret. They would finally have a closure soon, and she wanted to welcome it with a smile.

Sasuke just shrugged off her didn't need such empty gestures of her concern, didn't need her sympathy.

But still, he found himself agreeing with a silent nod.

They entered the shop once more, and a waitress came to take their orders.

"Hai, Sakura-san," the waitress said, giving them the menu.

Sakura just waved it off. Since she already had a cup of her own, she thought she'd be ordering for Sasuke alone, and she'd known what it would be by heart.

"It's okay, Megu-chan. Just give him a cup of espres – "

"No need," he cut in sharply.

Sakura looked at him briefly before smiling and bowing to the waitress who then eventually left.

"Things have been different, Sakura," he said before sneering, "You can't expect things to be the same like before, can you?"

Sakura winced at how icy his tone was. She was aware that it couldn't be the same but was that her fault alone? Wasn't he the one who had decided to let go in the first place? But instead of shooting back, she just nodded with a thin smile.

"How are you?"

He scoffed. He couldn't believe she still had the heart to ask that. He had already lied through his teeth when he insinuated that he no longer liked that particular coffee, that she no longer knew him as she had before, and he thought, with everything between them getting over soon, it wouldn't hurt to make a streak out of it.

"I'm well," he clucked his tongue, "Better."

She bit her quivering lips before taking a sip of her coffee. It hurt more deeply than she could imagine to hear him say he was happy. Without her. She dreaded being on the receiving end of the same question because she wasn't quite confident she could give him the same answer. He just couldn't know.

"You? You were gone for a long time," he said nonchalantly.

He wanted to stop caring, but he just needed to know if all his efforts on finding her were futile because she had gone to somewhere he couldn't reach or because she had been hiding from him. And he needed to know if she was a mother already so that he could also finally put to rest his selfish dream of building a family with her.

She gave him the only honest answer she could give. "I had to move to Okinawa. The shop opened a branch there and I had to take on the job."

She had remembered the day her boss told her about it, but she initially refused because she couldn't leave Sasuke. However, that night of Sasuke and Ino's engagement, she just knew she had to run away even if it was a cowardly thing to do.

Sasuke just looked at her stolidly as he recalled asking the coffee shop's owner about her whereabouts but was offered a negative answer. Then he surmised that of course, she wouldn't want _him_ to know about it. It made sense after the all pain he had put her through.

Sakura couldn't understand his reaction so she began to elaborate. "It was supposed to be a temporary stay . . . " she trailed off because if she would be perfectly honest, she would have half a mind to let him know that she couldn't actually make it through for so long without seeing him.

"But then you met him," he supplied before eyeing the ring on her finger. He said it as indifferently as he could, never wanting to let her know just how much it was crushing him.

Sakura also looked at her ring. _No. I couldn't forget about you._

But instead, she muttered a 'yes.'

She then noticed that unlike her, there was no sign of lifelong commitment on his finger. She was just about to ask about his wedding with Ino when he had beat her to it.

"When did you get married?"

He just needed to know for the sake of having a peace of mind. Just this last piece of information about her, and he could finally move on, let go of the what-could've-been.

Sakura then began to panic at being struck by an unexpected question. She folded her hands, touching her ring desperately before tearing her glance away.

"I don't think . . . it's any of your business now."

"Of course," he replied swiftly before standing up. "I'm going." And despite himself, he added, "Congratulations on your wedding."

She wanted to call him back, but she had already made her choice of lying to him. There was no turning back. This was enough, she thought. She had seen him for one last time. She could now move on and let go of the things that will now never be.

xxx

She said it'd be enough, but she just had to go back here before she would depart for Okinawa tomorrow. Her boss had already given her permission to leave her post there and work back here in Tokyo. He was willing to let her run the coffee shop that he was opening in a district just a few miles away, but she insisted that she go back there instead. She had also learned from him that Sasuke went to ask him about her five years ago but as promised, he didn't breathe a single world. The boss then asked her about their relationship, but she just shook her head to which he gave an understanding nod and a fatherly tap on her shoulder.

She drew out the key from inside her bag. The place was unlit, and she figured he would have no use for this apartment that they used to share now that he was a married man. It might've even been bought already by another person. But for the sake of their much-needed closure, she went back here to ;eave the key – this key that had once allowed her into his life.

But the door had been locked for years, and she doubted this key in her hands would ever fit again.

She was about to crouch to lay it on the floor when the door swung open. She looked up to meet those stony onyx eyes.

Startled, she fumbled for excuses to say. "Oh, sorry. I didn't – I guess . . . I guess I just want to return the key – "

Sasuke could only narrow his eyes at her. A turmoil of emotions stirred within him. He was beyond yet somehow less than hopeful as to what her purpose could be for suddenly showing in his doorstep. But most of all, he was confused and angry.

There was no stopping to this whirlwind sham of a romance, was there?

But before he could even speak, his phone rang, breaking through the stifling silence.

He looked at the screen before pressing it to his ear. "Ino. Yes. I'll be there."

Another pang of jealousy hit her, but as soon as he hung up, she found herself asking him.

"Are you staying here?" _Because if you're with her, then why are you here?_

He closed the door before facing her again. "I don't see how it's any of your concern," he replied coldly.

She composed herself even when it was proving to be more difficult by the minute. _Of course, it was just my wishful thinking._

"Yes, I know. I just – "

Then Sasuke just couldn't take it anymore. He grabbed her shoulders and pushed her against the door. She'd never seen his eyes so feral before, and she was terrified that all he could ever feel for her now was nothing else but sheer wrath.

"Tell me, Sakura. Why are you here? Why did you have to return?" he asked, his voice, hard and breathless.

Tears were welling up, but she kept them in check. "I'm sorry," she could only mutter.

He let her go and turned away sharply, breathing out a heavy sigh, his hand crumpling his face. He didn't want to make her cry anymore. He never should've let her.

"You have nothing to apologize for. Just go. You shouldn't be here. You should be with your husband – "

She gave out a humorless chuckle. "You don't know anything."

When he faced her with a questioning expression, she knew she had to be ready to bear the last brunt of this emotional whiplash.

"The same thing goes for you, Sasuke! Why do you stay here? You should be with your wife!" she snarled, her fists clenching.

Sasuke shook his head. "I'm not married. Ino ran way with her lover the night of our engagement."

Sakura could only look at him, uncertainty and disbelief marring her features. He took this as a sign to continue. She had the right to know even when it would no longer change a thing.

"I drove back here," he continued, "But you'd already left. I tried searching for you but . . . but that's over now. We have nothing else to talk about."

She then rounded on him, her tears now freely streaming down. "You didn't believe me when I told you I loved you. I was so sure, Sasuke, and you just stepped on my feelings like that – "

"Because how could you?" he shot back.

"You made me, Sasuke!" she exclaimed in despair before jabbing a finger onto his chest, "You made me believe that you cared for me when all of that was just out of pity – "

Then completely throwing his self-restraint out the window, he kissed her with all that he had, securing her by the waist, turning them about so he could open the door. They were a walking pair of chaotic mess as they clung onto each other desperately. Sakura palmed his cheeks, forcing her way into his mouth and battling it out with him, needing to feel nothing else but him and only him.

Sasuke brought his other hand to cover one of hers when he felt the cold, metallic reminder of the reality. He broke away sharply. He could see her swollen lips, and a sense of pride bloomed in him upon realizing she had responded, but the feeling was immediately squashed by the glare of her ring even in this darkness, with only a faint sliver of light streaming in from the outside.

"Just go," he said abruptly before moving to shuffle out the door.

Sakura, however, blocked his way. "You can't." She needed to feel him again for now and forever. She couldn't let him go away this time. She would fight now that she knew she had stood a chance all this time.

She just had to clear up this misunderstanding.

"Move," he ordered sternly.

"No. I let you get away the last time. But not this time. Not ever."

He looked at her with disgust. "What games are you playing at, Sakura?"

"This isn't a game to me, Sasuke."

He snorted derisively. "Keeping a man by your side when you already have a hus – "

Sakura launched herself onto his chest. She didn't want to hear such painful accusations from him. But he could only offer those eyes devoid of any love for her. She backed away, hurt and grieved.

She shook her head hard as she stared at the floor, her tears never ceasing.

"I'm not married, Sasuke. I'm not!"

She then crumbled down onto the floor, sobbing into her hands. "Why can't you believe me? I've loved you all these years, can't you see? God knows how much I've tried to forget about you. I told myself I'd stay there for good but I can't. I needed to see you. I just want to see a glimpse of you and thought that I'd be fine with just that because I thought, I thought you're married! It hurt like hell when you left me here that time but I couldn't just get over you. I, I had to wear this ring, tell people I'm married, that my husband is somewhere else because I couldn't stop loving you," she paused, looking up at him, "In my fantasies, we're together because I couldn't love anyone else. What else am I supposed to do? I love you so much I don't know what to do. So, just tell me, Sasuke, tell me what to do to let you go!"

She then stood up, swiping at her tears resolutely. "Fine. I'll just, I'll just leave and, and forget about you, about all this," she finished weakly, reaching for the door. She was so damn tired of crying, of hurting, of her tears never amounting to anything.

In just one step, Sasuke was hugging her tightly from behind. God, he couldn't believe how he had managed to hurt this woman who had done nothing but to love him more than he would know and could ever deserve. He couldn't imagine what kind of life she had led when he turned her away. He wouldn't be able to fathom the pain she had to live through for years because of his reckless decisions and actions. He would atone for her pain even if it'd take him forever.

"I'm so sorry," he said. He wished he could say some more to comfort her, but he meant it this time, and he would never let go again.

He then nuzzled her neck affectionately, breathing in the scent that he had missed tremendously. He turned her around and took his time placing gentle kisses on her forehead, her tear-stained eyes, and along the bridge of her nose before finally claiming her lips.

Sakura broke the kiss tentatively. It felt right to be in his arms again. She had finally dreamed this scene into reality, but she needed to make sure that this time it wouldn't be the last.

That they would last.

"Sasuke . . . I don't think I'd be able to stand it . . . if you'd leave me again so please, if you're still not sure – "

He pressed his lips against hers. "I've been stupid, Sakura. But not this time. I won't let you go."

Sakura smiled before he leaned in again to capture her lips. Unlike their last kiss that was rough and charged with an irrational mix of anger and need, their union this time was slow and driven by soft caresses. Sasuke cradled the back of her head, titling it to have a better access to her mouth. Sakura did her part all the same, nipping at his lower lip, meeting the thrust of his tongue with the same fervor. She clutched at his shoulders as he lifted her up against him, carefully taking the steps towards the room they had once shared. He gently laid her down before pulling for a breath's distance. He ran his thumb along her lower lip, and Sakura slightly opened her mouth to kiss his finger, looking at him with glazed eyes, pleading.

"I missed you, Sasuke-kun," she rasped.

Hearing her say his name so endearingly brought him back down, crashing his lips over hers once more as she stroke her sides. He then began to lick his way down languidly, taking his time to explore every inch of her skin, every crevice of the body of this woman he treasured so dearly. Sakura moaned a sweet gasp when he sucked on her pulse, laving it with his tongue after. She became rather impatient that there were still barriers between them so she tugged at his shirt roughly, wanting to tear it off his body if only she could. Sasuke, in response, grabbed her insistent wrists before tracing his way back to her lips.

"Let me take care of you, Sakura," he said huskily.

He then felt for the hem of her blouse, riding it up until his hand was touching her bare stomach. He slid down to pepper it with his kisses, loving how she was easily now making those punctuated mewls of pleasure. But Sakura would have none of this. She threaded her fingers through his hair, gripping it slightly to still his actions. She then sat up, grabbing him by his nape before she slanted her lips on him.

"Please. Don't make me wait for too long."

He kissed the corner of her mouth, smiling. "I want to savor each moment, Sakura."

"We can always do that later. I need you now . . ." She blushed a furious red with her bold invitation, but she held his gaze.

He could only smirk as he tasted her lips for one last time before helping her pull up her blouse. He pushed her gently back down as he resumed kissing her neck before paying attention to the tops of her breasts still held by the feminine garment. His hand then snaked down in search for her warmth, finding its way underneath her skirt, and cupping the delicious heat radiating from her center. Sakura whimpered when he started to stroke her there at the same time that he had showered attention to the little peaks of pleasure on her breasts through the fabric. Soon enough, her wet entrance happily welcomed his probing finger, and she was crying out in release.

She then reached for his lips once more and started unbuttoning his shirt as he unbuckled his belt. They freed each other's body from the offending pieces of clothing posthaste, and Sasuke was back licking the valley between her breasts before focusing on one pert nipple. Sakura, her body charged with pent-up desire and need, grounded her hips against his, making him let out a growl, stopping him from his ministrations. She needed to feel him now. To make a point, she hooked a leg around his torso so that he'd be forced to finally meet her where she needed him the most.

Sasuke recognized her growing impatience and plunged his tongue into her parted mouth at the same time that he drove home. Sakura peeled her lips away to let out a moan. Sasuke surged on as he continued his assault on her lips and neck. It felt incredible to have the length of her body writhing underneath him, and this time, he knew it wasn't because of some form of repayment but of something eternal.

To add to her pleasure, he would sometimes keep the pace maddeningly slow only to bury himself again to the hilt. She was now panting, clutching tightly at the base of his neck, giving him sloppy kisses all over as she felt him pulsing within her, stretching her out, repeatedly hitting her sweet spot. Their union had never been this powerful before. And she knew what had made the difference.

"I love you," she panted, holding him fast against her. Sasuke, in turn, grazed his teeth against her earlobe, whispering back with the same frenzied intensity, "I love you more." As if to prove it, he slid down his hand to where they were connected and caressed her bundle of nerves.

Just like that, she clenched down on him hard, screaming out his name in an overwhelming bliss as he adjusted the angle and thrust a few more times before he also gritted out his own release.

Sasuke stayed within her for a few more heartbeats before relishing the warmth and lying beside her. Sakura immediately scrambled up to his chest, wrapping her arm around his torso as she feathered kisses just below his collarbone. When he brought up her face to kiss her, he was met with the sight of her looming tears, alarming him.

For one brief second, fear entered his mind. _What if she regretted everything?_

Sakura noticed the distress on his face so she helped herself up and quickly placed a reassuring kiss on his lips to which he responded instantly.

She then reluctantly let go, her fingers resting on his cheek.

"You were also crying that time," he stated worriedly as he reminisced the night of their fallout.

"You don't need to worry. Just that . . . before, I thought we will never be. It hurts, you know. I didn't want you to be just here on this bed beside me. I want you," she sought for his hand, "here," she said as she rested his palm on her chest. "Have always. And I thought you didn't want me that way."

Sasuke then flipped them over. "I've always wanted you since the first time I saw you in the shop. It was plain torture, Sakura," he said roughly, brushing away some wisps of hair from her face.

Hearing him say that had filled her with such happiness that no amount of physical contact could ever give. However, she wouldn't want it any other way. She had no complaints about receiving satisfaction in any form as long as it was from Sasuke.

She chuckled at him coyly. "The torture ends now, Sasuke-kun." With that, she pushed up her pelvis against his, launching them into another round of lovemaking.

xxx

When Sakura woke up for the second time that morning, Sasuke was no longer there. But she had a rich smile on her face. Sasuke had told her a couple of hours ago that he just needed to sort things out in the office but that he'd be back soon to spend the day with her. Afterwards, he said, _"I'll make sure to take my time later."_ She still could feel the tingling sensation that his declaration had caused. It also didn't help that her imagination had finally let loose and run wild.

She had spent a few minutes on shower before putting on one of Sasuke's shirts. She wanted to see his reaction once she welcomed him back with only that piece of clothing. But she would save it for their enjoyment later. For now, she had to borrow a pair of sweatpants.

She was looking for something to cook up in the fridge when the doorbell rang. _That was_ quick, she thought as she hastily maneuvered her way to the door, ready to jump at Sasuke the moment it opened.

However, a different face came into view.

"I knew it!" the blonde-haired girl shrilled before hugging Sakura.

Sakura was at a loss for words even when the other girl had already begun to chatter away.

"I'm so so glad that you're here now, Saku-chan! By the way, you can tell Sasuke that I forgive him for ditching us on dinner last night. But tell him that next time, he must bring you along and – "

Sasuke's ex-fiancée must have noticed her expression because she had stopped and gave her a concerned look.

"Honey, don't worry. He's not leaving you this time. I assure you."

Sakura shook her head slightly. She wasn't worried about that. She just didn't know how to handle a conversation with the woman she had mistakenly got jealous of in the past. That and the fact that she wasn't really properly dressed.

"I'm sorry," she started shyly, "Just that this is the first time we met and – "

Ino then grabbed her hand. "Wait, I have an idea! We'll do some catching up soon and celebrate our friendship but for now we have to go somewhere!"

Upon having been briefed on Ino's idea, Sakura politely begged her new friend that they drop by her apartment first so that she could change into something more appropriate. Ino just giggled and gave an amused 'yes,' but not without letting Sakura know that Sasuke would've loved to see her anyway especially in his shirt.

Her face was still beet red when they pulled over in front of the Uchiha Inc. Ino held her hand as they speedily went past all the company's personnel who were giving them strange looks. They made it safe to the elevator, but Sakura couldn't calm down her nerves. She knew what was going to happen and dreaded it. She was ready but –

"Sasuke will be with you," Ino smiled at her, giving her hand a comforting squeeze.

The elevator dinged, and it sounded like a toll of the bell to Sakura's ears, but she didn't have much time to ponder on it as they finally came to a halt in front of a mahogany door bearing the embossed golden letters that read "Director's Office."

Sakura wanted to gather her thoughts first, making a move to talk to Ino about it, but the latter had already twisted the knob open, dragging Sakura into the room.

Sasuke's eyes grew at the sight of the very girl that had become the subject of his argument with his father. He had come into the office to tell them about his plans of introducing to them the woman he loved, to which his mother delightfully reacted. However, when she came to know that it was Sakura, the woman from five years ago, she grew silent while his father voiced out his solid opposition to what Sasuke wanted.

Sasuke was happy to see her here, but he feared for her. He couldn't let his parents hurt her. She couldn't be put through so much pain again. He wanted to be able to protect her this time so that she wouldn't have to run away.

He then made a move to where she was.

"I'm Haruno Sakura," she began firmly as she stood unwaveringly under his father's scrutinizing gaze. "I know I'm not fit to be with your son but I will not let him go. I love him too much to do that so – "

She then felt his presence beside her, his hand caging hers. She had made her decision, and so was he. He would never let go.

"She's the woman I want to marry," he announced both to his parents and then to Sakura, bringing their clasped hands to his lips.

They smiled tenderly at each other, mutually hearing the unsaid.

 _We will fight together._

xxx

* * *

I feel compelled to add another chapter, but I don't want to make promises so I'll be tagging this as "Complete" for now and you can also think of it that way in case I don't ever get to write off another one.

To _Rainbow Sparkles_ , I just graduated last month, too, and I finished a Literature degree. I can't speak of my other account so publicly, but if you can shoot me a message about it, then I'll tell you. I'm sorry. I hope you understand that I'm trying to separate my two writing personalities. This account is for my alter ego where I kinda let my id to rule over me a bit. My other account is for my endeavors as someone who wants to be a full-fledged writer in the future.

Please review for the last (?) time and support me in my future projects. I'm _planning_ to work on a vampire!Sasuke fic. I've been dreaming about the plot since I was ten, and now I know that Sasuke would best suit my fantasies. I also want to write some InoSai!

P.S. I'm okay now. Thanks so much for all your kind words. See ya'll around!


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